From prison cell to my first solo show

Recently released from a long jail term, Bobby is now an established painter with an ambition to help other prison artists

My initial experience of art came by way of the surrealist artist Salvador Dalí. Aged just 11, I was indoctrinated into the world of institutional life via a lengthy stint in an approved school. That old Victorian convent was to be my reluctant place of abode until I was 16. 

With its high ceilings and gloomy, long passageways, it was a frighteningly imposing building. The kind of edifice designed to oppress and assert its will upon you and quite capable of leaving a person feeling both inferior and chastised simultaneously. It was before one of those thick, cold stone walls that I stood transfixed on my first day there.

Displayed in front of me was the strangest image I’d ever seen: a huge painting of swans upon a weird-looking swampy lake, yet their reflection in the water was that of elephants. It was by Dalí and was titled ‘Swans Reflecting Elephants’ – truly odd indeed. Whilst preoccupied with my attempt to understand the two separate feelings of fascination and disquiet that this image evoked within me, I failed to hear the approaching footsteps, and more importantly, I also failed to avoid the accompanying slap to my ear hole.

Amid the searing pain, tinnitus and innate anger raging within me, I was completely incapable of answering the machine gun of questions being fired at me. “What you doing, boy? Where are you supposed to be? Who are you, boy?” A wonderful introduction to art. All these years later I still associate that particular painting with the injustice of a perforated ear drum and the cruelty of a system that would punish a child for observing what’s on display.

My story has too much of a complex history to write down in just a few hundred words, but a brief overview shows a pretty chaotic life. I’ve only recently been released from jail, having spent a considerable amount of time behind the door. I was sent for a life sentence in 1994 for taking the life of an innocent man. I’ve spent the past few decades trying desperately to be a decent individual and present the best version of myself possible. 

A little while back, I was fortunate enough to meet a forward-thinking governor (Becky Hayward) who gave me permission to develop a website with the caveat that I remain anonymous. That was when Steeldoorstudios was created in 2022, and since then has gone from strength to strength. 

I’ve always been into drawing but came to paint late in life due to what I perceived as a hindrance (I’m colour blind). The last decade has seen me concentrating on my art practice and figuring out where I want to go with it, as well as what I want to say. 

The nature of my work is primarily autobiographical, depicting the journey that I and many others of my ilk have traversed. 

I delve into the core beliefs and default positions instilled into young children ensconced in the institutions of an oxymoronic ‘care system’, and how those experiences often warp and influence a child’s mind. 

I find the therapeutic value of creativity and artwork to be unparalleled in the healing process of my journey. Standing in front of my easel, immersed in the work, gives me the opportunity to reflect upon my life experiences and take account of my actions in a way that nothing else ever did. Today, I take responsibility for all that I am and the choices I made and make. 

To date, I have had half a dozen collaborative exhibitions, including with Koestler Arts and the Ikon Gallery in Birmingham. My first solo exhibition is running at the National Justice Museum in Nottingham. It opened at the end of May and carries on until 1 November. Next year sees another collaborative exhibition coming to fruition alongside Dr Dean Kelland, which is themed on ventriloquism and the alter ego. 

My plan for the future is to open up the steeldoorstudios.com website to other incarcerated artists who want the opportunity of getting their work out into the public domain. We will offer each artist their own page on the site. It will still remain anonymous, in order to safeguard the individual as well as our victims.